Soap’s got new robots, just in time for the apocalypse

579117e8ce592668e9eac76f159ac280506165055a75326cadd3a8e4862cdafa“The Zombie Apocalypse” is a phrase that’s so widely used these days it borders on the redundant. The sad truth is, most people have forgotten that there are other kinds of apocalypses! (Apocalypsi?)

Well, I’m not going to tell you which other apocalypse will take place in my forthcoming novel The Non-Zombie Apocalypse (pre-sales available now on Kickstarter!), but I will tell you that the unlikely hero of the book, Sophia “Soap” Lazarchek, is as ready as can be thanks to her handy helpers.

Soap is a robotics student, so, naturally, when things to pear-shaped, she calls upon her mechanized legions (all 10 of them) to wrestle the topsy-turvyness out of the world. She’s got a set of rough androids made to look like zombies, she’s got a small squadron of quad-copter attack drones, and, of course, she’s got her faithful helper Rusty, the mechanical scorpion-dog with a nerf-gun on his tail.

Together, they… well, I wish I could say they stood a chance, but, come on– they’re going against thousands of non-zombies. The odds are pretty slim. What’s Soap going to do?

Less than a week until the Kickstarter release of The Non-Zombie Apocalypse! And, in case you can’t wait, here’s a video of a Atlas, who is arguably the real-words most sophisticated android so far:

My unofficial stretch goals

stretch monster2Anybody remember the Stretch Monster toy? I loved that thing. My sister loved it even more– she stole it from me, swaddled it in a blanked, and it became her “Green Baby.”

Talk about a face only a mother could love…

Anyway, being inspired by the bizarre stretchability of good ol’ Green Baby, I couldn’t help but come up with some bizarre stretch goals of my own.

Mind you, these are not official goals– official stretch goals are about improving the product so that backers get even more than they originally bargained for. The real stretch goals are listed on Kickstarter project page and I think you’ll agree that they’re pretty amazing already.

These unofficial stretch goals are just goofy things (but I solemnly swear to fulfill these goals in the extremely unlikely event that the Non-Zombie Apocalypse Kickstarter project gets there.)

$5,001– I’ll perform the snoopy dance and post the video to Youtube

$6,001– I’ll dress up as Nikola Tesla and hand out applications to the Mad Science Institute at Gencon and Emerald City Comicon (and maybe Halloween).

$6,002– I’ll perform the snoopy dance in the Tesla costume and post it on Youtube

$10,001– I’ll buy a Masterpiece Soundwave. This has nothing to do with the Mad Science Institute, but it’s frickin’ cool.

$40,001– The Menace From Beyond RPG will also be fully funded. Everyone who backed this project will also get a free PDF of the RPG core book.

$100,001– I’ll get a tattoo of the Mad Science Institute crest. Backers get to vote where on my body it will be placed.

So, yeah none of those are realistic, but they might be fun!




Stretch goals: Soap’s application essay, lab coat color choices, and more

When I started The Non-Zombie Apocalypse project on Kickstarter, I had some stretch goals listed as “???” True confession: I really didn’t know what they were going to be since I didn’t think it would ever get that high. But now that this project is off to such a fast start, I realized I better figure it out. I brainstormed and came up with so many great ideas that I’m dropping the goal level just so I can fit them all in.

Here’s the new run-down:

$2,500: Nikki’s story added to Three Weeks Before Doomsday

$3,000: a 3rd desktop screen design for all backers PLUS T-Shirts become an add-on item (white design on black shirt)

$4,000: Soap’s application essay added to Three Weeks Before Doomsday

$5,000: Mad Science Bookmarks for all backers over $25 PLUS Choice of lab coat colors (black, white, gray, blue, navy)

$6,000: ???

$7,000: ???

This time I really do know what the “???” but we’ll have to get closer to those goals before I reveal them!

Whenever we hit a stretch goal, everyone gets more! So please share this Kickstarter project with anyone you think might enjoy it.Onward and upward!

Filming the trailer for The Non-Zombie Apocalypse

Not long ago I filmed the video for the April 2nd release of The-Non-Zombie Apocalypse on Kickstarter. When I started, I knew nothing about video production. Now I know a tiny fraction more than I did, but more importantly I had fun!

My writing desk. I thought it would make a good backdrop for the parts where I do my ‘splainin’.IMAG0793

I think I actually did okay on the editing. Here’s a rough cut of my first take on the first 18 seconds of the opening:

CameraBot. When I tried filming it myself, I had to use Bumblebee to get my camera (aka my phone) up to the right height. 

JARVIS - WIN_20140307_160447


But I just didn’t have the right equipment. As you can tell in this 18 second clip, the sound quality is terrible:

Bring in the pro. Then along came Andy Gill– no, not the English rocker, but the video production guru. He brought over just a TINY bit of equipment I didn’t have… enough to fill most of my living room!


Boom! Instant studio. Much better than Bumblebee! 


The vid will be released tomorrow on Kickstarter. I hope you enjoy watching it as much as I enjoyed making it!

Pre-sales bonuses for The Non-Zombie Apocalypse

non zombie apocalypse on kickstarter

The Non-Zombie Apocalypse will be on Kickstarter in 1 week!

I decided to go with crowd funding the release because it meant I could offer:

  1. Exclusive goodies. Lab coats, diplomas, and more!
  2. Bonus stories. Backers get bonus prequel short stories!
  3. Speedy delivery. Cutting out the middle-man will help me get the books to readers more quickly
  4. Most importantly: it’ll be fun!

So whether you’re a Kickstarter vet or you’ve never heard of crowd-funding before, You can help make this a successful project by telling your friends and fellow readers about all about it.

I’m glad to say that backers of The Non-Zombie Apocalypse won’t have to wait long for delivery, and they won’t have to fret about whether the project will get done. That’s because The Non-Zombie Apocalypse is already finished. It’s written, edited, and ready to go to the printer. I’m going to ship to Kickstarter backers in June if not sooner, which is before I ship to stores.

Also, just wait until you see my goofy self trying to explain things in the project video. There are even robots in it!

The Non-Zombie Apocalypse Kickstarter campaign runs April 2 through May 2, 2014. Hope to see you there!

I hate keeping secrets, so here’s the scoop on prequel short stories!

3wbdoom coverWhen I get excited about something, I hate keeping it to myself. For the past several months, I’ve been about to pop with this news, but I needed to wait until I could work out the distribution details.

Today’s the day! I’m really excited that I finally get to announce this collection of short stories that pick up with the lives of several of the characters (some major characters, some minor) a few weeks prior to the start of Mad Science Institute.

When you read these stories, you’ll get to see who was doing what and also why some characters (such as McKenzie and Angela) got involved in the novel. It will also expand the world and the tech, plus give you an adrenaline boost as you read it.

How much, you ask? It will be FREE for Kickstarter backers, and it will never be in print again after this, so don’t miss out.

Kickstarter pre-sales begin April 2.

Stay tuned for more info!



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